1 Corinthians 13:4-7
Love is patient, Love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Familiar?
This verse is probably the most popular verse used in weddings, printed on coffee cups, cards and bumper stickers.
When Hubby and I became engaged 13 years ago we agreed to get married in my childhood church, I had always known that I wanted a church wedding.
Is that bizarre for a girl reluctantly attended church for Weddings, Funerals and Christenings?
Not in Younger Julie’s World.
So off we went to meet with the Reverend and plan the service.
Wait we have to have marriage counselling?
Grrrrrr, this wasn’t in my plan but if we must.
OK so we did that, drove for an hour each way to meet with the Reverend (can you tell that my priority was this meeting?) and hear about God’s role in our marriage.
At the time frankly I wasn’t thinking God so much as how I was going to feel being the girl in White Dress if you know what I mean.
Marriage counselling finished we began planning the service, balancing what I knew others would want together with what we wanted was stressful to say the least.
When it came time to choose from the list of verses we saw this verse at the top of the list and grabbed on.
It was perfect, not too much God or religion and based upon Love.
We had a wonderful Wedding, it was everything I’d dreamed of and more.
But a funny thing has happened over time.
My husband and I have changed, grown.
My marriage has experienced peaks and valleys, some of these valleys were much lower than I would have ever imagined.
We have been challenged in ways we couldn’t have prepared for…health, finances, faith….but we had one thing which kept us going.
Something unique to us.
We had each other.
There is nobody in the world who knows me as well as Hubby does, He often will know what’s in my heart and on my mind before I even realize what it is.
During times when I was weak He was my support, He showed me my strength.
I cannot say that we have always been 100% connected.
During the valleys of our marriage we’ve become very disconnected.
At times it was so dark that I became the epitome of selfish, lost in my own ego and desires.
One specific valley almost caused me to lose my marriage.
To lose the one person in the world who knew me, all of me and still loved me.
My self-hatred almost cost me the most important person in my life.
I thank God each day that I didn’t.
I thank God that both Hubby and I have found Jesus Christ and dedicated our lives to God.
I thank God that I have a chance to live life with a clear mind and clear heart.
I thank God that I got a second chance to nurture my marriage and honor my Hubby.
This morning when I read the AA Daily Reflections these thoughts were brought to the forefront of my mind.
This is what I read:
A WIDE ARC OF GRATITUDE April 7, 2011
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Am I capable of such generous tribute and gratitude to my wife, parents and friends, without whose support I might never have survived to reach A.A.’s doors? I will work on this and try to see the plan my Higher Power is showing me which links our lives together.
Wow huh?
These daily readings which I do over a cup of coffee in the morning certainly take me time to ponder.
Today I can answer YES to these questions but only because I’m doing this journey of life with effort.
I’m no longer floating, reacting or avoiding.
Without my Hubby I wouldn’t have gotten sober, nor would I still be sober.
I wouldn’t be able to see God’s work in my life or be willing to face exactly who I am.
I wouldn’t have learned to love myself.
These days I’m amazed at how God linked me together with this man I’m married to, that God knew we could make an amazing journey TOGETHER.
My aim is to spend my life attempting to fulfill the verse spoken at my wedding as follows:
Julie is patient, Julie is kind. Julie does not envy, Julie does not boast, Julie is not proud. Julie does not dishonor others, Julie is not self-seeking, Julie is not easily angered, Julie keeps no record of wrongs. Julie does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. Julie always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Now I just know some of my peeps are beginning to smile, reclining a little with a raised brow…yeah right Julie, have you met yourself?
OK I admit it, I’m aiming high but I seek progress rather than perfection and anything is possible through God.
It is certainly worth the effort.
They are worth the effort.
Beautiful Julie! It is so important to have that foundation, because as we all know when we're being honest, life is never neat and tidy. I had my brother (who passed away this past year) read that passage at my wedding. I knew it was cliche but I really like it. Now that he's gone, I have the treasure of remembering him reading it out always.
This really brought tears to my eyes. You are so lucky, Julie.
Hey Kim, thanks for your blog love. How wonderful it is that you have your brother attached in your memory to such an amazing verse.Thank you for reading Pat ;) You're right, I'm blessed.
That is so sweet, a strong love & faith can really bring you out of those valleys.
You have been blessed. And that great thing is that you recognize it and appreciate it.
@doggielover it certainly can ;)
It's always a good plan to aim for the highest point. And definitely worth the effort. I love the photos of then and now.
I could definitely work on adding my name into those blanks…these days I wouldn't do so well. ;-)You guys sound great for each other…I'm glad He brought you together. Great post!
@ILoveMyDogandMy Music I agree wholeheartedly!
@Robin I am too, thanks Robin
I love how you put your name into the scripture. I am going to write that out with my name inserted, not yours of course, lol and hang it in my bathroom right by the mirror. Lovely post Julia….I really do look forward to your posts so much.
Thank you, Julie, for directing me to this post. What a beautiful couple you two are and what a great way to start your marriage. I am proud to report an update from the post I sent you too… for about 2 months now, my wife and I (and our little girl) are back living together and loving each other. Love truly is patient.All the best…Darren
Oh Darren that is WONDERFUL!!!!