Happy Monday morning friends.
Our family is home after a long weekend away, there is a blog to come about the weekend but in the meantime here I am catching up on the 100+ blogs I choose to follow.
Today I want you all to head over to my friend Ellie’s site, One Crafty Mother. Ellie is interviewing Amy Hatvany who has authored the book Best Kept Secret.
Best Kept Secret is :
“A timely novel about a mother whose life falls apart when she descends into alcoholism, and her battle to get sober and regain custody of her son.”
I haven’t yet read the book, I just ordered it but something in the interview struck home for me. Amy states the following:
“I think as women in our culture – whether or not we are mothers – we are certainly driven by perfectionism. We are told we can do it all, be it all, have it all. Of course, we can’t – at least, not “perfectly” – so I wanted to portray how as a result, many women experience profound levels of shame and self-loathing, even as we smile brightly and tell ourselves that we can’t expect to always be perfect at everything in our lives. But deep down, perhaps subconsciously, I think we still believe that we “should” be. So we reach for behaviors that drown our shame out, at least temporarily. And then we become ashamed of the behavior, and a vicious cycle emerges. I’m not just talking about alcohol, here. Eating disorders, shopping, gambling, sex – even our careers can serve as an “escape” from the pressure. “
I would love to know your thoughts, did you experience such loathing that you turn to something as a tool to provide happiness?
Do you now?
How did you change this behavior?
If you are a mother how are you changing this pattern with your kids?
With two little girls here I’m already seeing internal confidence issues and would love the feedback.